Poetry On Mental Health Disorders

Mania

Walking past those busy streets

You whisper, drawing me into your grasp

My body is a haunted house

Where roots reach out like fingers

That whispers trailing my steps

Then you touch me

Was it only me who you touched

Or you brush past other sleeves

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

                                                                                          Bipolar

We walk around that earth holding hands

I look and breath as you

In the darkness of my wonderland

Would you bring to light the best of me

Or leave behind the worst bits of me that I seek to leave behind

I am wrapped within my own nest

My body apologizes to my own body

Not sure if it accepts

One shade more, one ray the less

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

                                                                                          Schizophrenia

The voices I hear are words that can’t describe the way I feel

When I look into your eyes

I hear silent cries

Telling me to come to see the world of lost reality

I try not to see those things

But mind without mind

Real darkness without light

You are a hope against a hope

The mindless mind

Moving from thought to thought

Thoughts are quite but never quite silenced

They find a reason to wake

Take a breath again and crawl back to my ear

But when you reach the end

It is just the start

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

ADHD

Reckless is that mind

Twisting, turning and churning winds

That continues without remorse

Always moving, can’t sit still

The violent spin sleeps in

It leads me to a nest of snore cold command

Topped off with light to fill empty parts

Showing off its great power

Sometimes I ask

Of your mercy, leave me there

Nor tell them where to find me

Then a rare blossom is shown

Where happiness is thrown

And only sadness is known

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

Anxiety

Watch me claw at my inside

Inhaling a deep breath

Chill spurring truth that drizzles from my mouth as exhaling

This abyss in my mind thriving in that endless labyrinth of library

But now all I have are frigid and vexed sheets

Taunting me in that fear of ink

That creeps up in all my thoughts

To eat through to resolution

But despair rhyme in my eyes with a fidget feet

My heart rebels and confined to rules within the cage of my chest

Waiting on its knees to be set free

Just to know that freedom isn’t a lie

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro


Depression

When the grey cloud rolls

My mind dives into treacherous waters

Silently creeps with a sweet purr slipped over me

With delirious desire to gently suffocate me

Weights tied to my feet sinking upon the ocean foam

Trying to claw my way up and out

If I could only end it all

It was this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

The eye leads and the mind follows

Never says done

When temptation is tied to a sacred oath for a change

My obstinate brain withstands it

Obsessively, I strive strongly on

Compulsively, I must disheartenedly obey

Disorderly, as the play smolders benignly

It all started with a thought

Germinated into lines

Until leaves sprout

Thorny and wild

Insistent and obsessed

Crowned with a cling

That cannot be argued but tamed

To hold me true

Without belief in pain

It is this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

Panic Attack

A lost piece of work

That takes over my throat

Claws tight like cloak of death

With no remorse and empathy of loss

Murmuring syllables

Blossoming there in my throat

Like a harrowing imposter

Losing my grip on reality   

Stream of tears fill my eyes

An infinity of darkness racing my heart

This terror will hiss and claw

Lying in joyous songs

Beneath your awe

Numbness invade

Until this peace hits with depths of silent

Filled with promise and repose

It is this chaos that made you beautiful

Ayman Terro

Advertisement

The “Am”

The Road that wasn’t Taken

A Blind Eye,
Marching blindly in the loss of
Self-Indentity.
But being self-propelled automaton,
That just ceases to grow.
A Raid into Existentialism1,
Iam…Iam…Iam…
Am I?
Iam the absurd body of “am”.
“am” is a hidden cave,
That hides in silence.
What do you hide in your farthest deeps?
Forward life moves,
But what if,
“Am” ceases to find meaning,
When sigh is trudging across
A troubled wave,
When dawn steeped in darkness,
Lacking all direction,
When Trudging seems all uphill,
Walking into the nothingness of
Scorn and Noise,
Nothing but nothing is at it seems.
Lost in the meaning of self,
The “am” doing2.
Breath evaporates without trace.
The ticking of the tower clock,
Cuts the silence like a knife…
Foray into Essentialism3,
“Am” was God’s secret name,
“Am” at a distance is forever on his way,
Coming nearer “am” is but a weaving,
Between “am” and the Lord,
Through all the grim doubts,
what seemed rebuke was Love most true.
The flesh surrendered,
Bodiless begun,
Throwing itself as a shadow,
Through the dread unknown,
But deep trust in Him,
What builds the refuge of “am”there,
The Road of the “am” being4.

By Ayman Terro

  1. Existentialism: what you do defines who you are
  2. “am” doing: Human doing
  3. Essentialism: who you are defines what you do
  4. “am” being: Human being

The Chorus of the Pulse

Pulse of love counting the number of times I take her name in minutes.
Pulse of marriage 2 hearts,
but one synergistic beat,
shaking in triumph with their long grey hair.
Pulse of deception is the actress,
that masters the art of deception.
Pulse of anger is the heart running away in pain,
but searching for pain that whorls down to darkness.
Pulse of sadness is the bleeding heart,
that runs along sidewalks where souls are lost.
Pulse of depression is the thunder of horses plunging too loud,
makes it difficult to hear your self-hatred.
Pulse of silence is the scream of miss.
Pulse of distance is louder than the pulse of silence.
Pulse of beauty is the breathing heart,
once it minds up its first beat.
Pulse of pain filling its blank cheque.
Pulse of support pulling verses from remains until inspiration sparks.
Pulse of hatred is a blinding flame clanging upon the heart.
Pulse of soul coursing through infinity.
Pulse of smile laying bare the heart artless, never affected by the muddy depths of its birth.
Pulse of rescue disdaining the reins of fate.
Pulse of hope is a whisper among the bustling crowd.
Pulse of betrayal calling for checkmate.
Pulse of logorrhoea is the river under the tongue.
Touch a finger to your pulse and stream your life.
It is the same life that shoots softened cries as you die by the green tree,
and rocked in the cradle of deep ebb.
It is the same life that shoots the dust-storm in numberless blades of grass, and breaks through a wave of field of flower blooms rising past my knees.

By A T

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Woven Tales of Nature Crushed

Water gushes down the hill
Where hidden stories were buried in the mountains
Singing out to the sea
But the sea-voice of elegy crowding
To the end
Signs of life shooting blossoms of crowds
Roots dug leagues into the ground
As it climbs something screams inside
As we chop it down
before it reaches the skies
Windhover displaying precious frames
Dipping it’s wings in the sun rays
Waving in that milky sky
But we swallowed your pride
Thrown away that scent of freedom
On the grave of dreams
Getting shadows shouting on the nightmare scream
I wonder how strange to the earth
We have become
It is this dying note
It’s choking on the words
that you are afraid to say
My soul is being drenched in Unescapable death
I hope once you would read my Lifeless story human
That is being shattered in moments
without being noticed
And come back and say
Hoping for that ever ending last breath
Mistakenly alive

By A.T

The Untitled

Purpose checkmated
Designs frustrated
Will resisted
But
Title is still reserved
Blood, sweat, tears
Nothing is left to beat
Praying for rain
Considered to be a healing
– a blanket-
But dealt with mud
Gadfly torrent
Still untitled
Never despair
The absolute extreme of self-love
Afraid of rotten luxury
Unfurl your sail of thoughts
Trust the promise of this opening
You shall hear a warning tune
In a distant idea’s fife
Of the End
Permanent gale aggrandizing
Sanguine splints
Off the untitled offing would we sail
To steer the zephyrs of sorrow
To earn the Virgin flecks of happiness
To be the dauntless Pathfinder
Of the title……
Casting off the cloaks of the Untitled…..

Mirrors For Reassurance

Gender Equality breakup
Fight mirrors
Evil organize in the spirit of
Antagonism
You stink of blood
You stink of unkept truth
Convection will always
beat you down
Pinned by Joules through this poetry
Then you
just bleed out their
You infect the blameless
You ingest war and pain
You are just thrown in a loop
Along an alley of unending
A choking cloud of smog
Hampering visibility of logic
Nuclear arms standing caress
waist Deep in cold smoke
Demonizing inactivity
Romanticizing the wild
A subtle torture
Restless Insomnia
Opt-out scenarios
Of gender equality
That Sex this war on
This War sweats for lies
The Symptom of a Vacuum Collapse

By A.T

Blotchy Eye

Unveil your eyes
Until blotches of black appear
And your eyes lose the glow
Alive with scars
Just as the pen’s nib
That scatters blood-tears
Blotches my words,
Cripples my verse.
Fills my poem with
The sound of melancholy,                          The Unison Shrill Wail.
Becomes a cadaver of
Love rest in peace.
Shall you depend on sight then?

Loop the Loop

Leaving home
The time when you come to the end
Of your rope
Venturing out by your feet
Venturing in loving heart that
Will hang on a tie knot
Endlessly
Leaving roads
Caught in a loop
Where our body is drawn to the
Same point home
The Centripetal Force
Memories never knock
Until you build a door
Filling the gaps of your fingers
With the one you love..
Life is the thief of time
Spreading its wings
Guarding our treasurer
The one we love
Distance whispering damn
As it means little when the one you love
Means so much